Keep “most romantic man” title to yourself with some tricks and tips

Did you know, all that a woman looks for in a man is romance. But for most men this doesn’t come easily, especially if they have never had to do it in the past. For those sort of men being romantic involves flowers and Chocolates, dinner (and not necessarily at a restaurant) and off to bed! At that point, the woman should be accommodating and grateful that he has made the effort. This could not be further from the truth, ask any woman, and if the man were smart, he would take note of the expression on her face.

Mind you, it is true that some women are easily pleased, and in some cases are just happy that a member of the opposite sex has taken any sort of interest in them! However, do not take that for granted and think carefully about the way you approach the subject of romance. Not that it is difficult to be romantic, but it’s just that making an effort seems beyond some men, especially after they have been in a relationship for a while. Then again, some are of the opinion, “why should it all come from me,” and I must say I am in some agreement with that school of thought, especially as we are way beyond the liberation days.

In general, men can be very romantic at the beginning of a relationship, but once they have their “catch,” then “no more Mr. Man of my dreams”. It is truly disheartening as smart men know it takes a lot more to solidify a relationship. If you want to keep your prize, you have to keep working. Maybe even send cake to Chandigarh to woo your boo! There will always be another man out there, who will want to turn her attention away from you. You can see the charm, through those gleaming white teeth, though you might call him a sleaze-ball! Ah, but wait wasn’t that you, once upon a time.

Some other helpful tidbits for your relationship:

Quarreling is communication

Communication with your partner is very important and I learnt that quarreling can play a very crucial role in relationships. Disagreements become opportunities for the relationship to grow because we get to learn more about our partner and through doing so can find ways to make the relationship even stronger. So be thankful for arguments because they are the things that keep your relationship going.

Quarrels keep the relationship going

I used to think that the perfect relationship would be living an idealistic fairy tale without any arguments or disagreements. Cinderella and Prince Charming never disagreed in any of the story books I’d read. So I had a very amicable and agreeable relationship with my ex-boyfriend where we never quarreled even once throughout the entire two years we were together. In retrospect, it wasn’t that everything was rosy and perfect but that there were many unspoken resentments towards each other that we didn’t know how to communicate about or just didn’t bother to. Perhaps occasionally disagreeing about something could have kept the relationship alive.

What to do post an argument?

The beauty of every uncomfortable situation is that you get to discover what you do not want, and also what you do want instead. When you are feeling lousy, it is easy to stay caught up in anger, hurt or frustration. By staying so focused on these negative emotions that we actually do not want, we forget that we can also now decide what we do want to feel instead because of the contrast that has been created by the argument. Choosing to focus on what you want to feel instead is not always easy because it is not our instinct to do so. However, making this choice is useful and crucial to provide relief and help you feel better. What you put your attention on multiplies so thinking ‘I want to feel better’ will inevitably bring you ways to feel better. Take responsibility for the way you feel and make the choice to feel better regardless of what he does.

Remember it’s the little things that mean the most. Just like the times a woman sends cake for birthday boy, think about when you suddenly had a little surprise from your partner or girlfriend, are those not the times you cherish the most. A drink or cup of tea, when one wasn’t expected. Women are no different and just knowing you care and are thinking of them, can help to keep that fire burning. You see, as with most things, it’s not a matter of finance; it’s just a matter of a little thought.

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